Solo Trek Synopsis

Right before school started this summer I took a trip with my family to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. I went willing with one stipulation; That I would get to go hiking for at least a day in the Smokey Mountains. What follows is a blog that I began but never finished about my first solo trip. Enjoy!... or don't.

Hiking in the wilderness alone this weekend was quite an experience. Within the past year I have picked up a huge passion for hiking and spending time in the wilderness. Since I have caught this bug I have only camped in groups no less than 4. Which has always been awesome and have loved and learned a lot from every minute of it.

This past weekend I was given the opportunity to take off for a day and night by myself in the Smokey Mountains. The Smokies although much lower in elevation than out west, always provide a very formidable challenge. Mostly because the trails are always extremely rocky and hard on your feet and there tends to be a lot of natural steps formed from the rockyness, which causes a ton of strain on your legs. Also, you are not climbing as high as you would in the rockies but your elevation increase pure mile is much higher. Basically the trail is always steep as hell.

For the first time in my hiking experience I used trekking poles. I have heard it said that they save you 60% of your energy on each step and although that number seems a little high they definitatly helped in various other ways. For one they saved me from rolling my ankle atleast seven times on the trail. Also being alone they give you a sense of comfort (false comfort) regardless they feel like company out on the trail and would help me defend myself against something that I came across? maybe. Anyways with all the time to myself and my thought I named my poles Lou Ellen and Regina. Lou Ellen is on the left and Regina is on the right. Overall a very worthy investment.

Saturday I hiked 17 miles and peaked Mt. Leconte, the second tallest peak in the smokies, twice in one day. It was one of the harder days of hiking I have ever had. The mileage made it tough but the steep climbs and the wet trail gave me wet heavy slipery boots the entire day that made it a much harder day than it would have been if i stayed dry.

I spent the night in a jam packed shelter with some really great people that I was able to hang around with and hear some great stories about life, family, careers, and places they had hiked. On the trail, much like veterans of war might share war stories with fellow veterans, we share stories, scars, and experiences of places we have hiked, each time trying to one up the person that just went. I lost the primordial pride battle quickly to a group of older much more versed hikers.

The next morning I woke up and could see that the sun was starting to creep its way over a distant mountain. I could tell even through my hazy and contact-less eyes that it was going to be a special sunrise. I packed as quickly as I could and headed for the "Jump Off". Someone had told me about a trial that juts off from the A.T. that ends with an incredible view. I knew after looking at my map the night before, that the view faced west and would provide for a perfect seat to watch the sunrise.

Almost as spectacular as the impending sunrise was the trail itself. It was eery, quite, lush, moist, dark, claustrophobic, and scary. It was right out of a fairy tail or a scene from the Lord of the Rings. It truly was a trail that was more than just a path to walk down, but very much alive and eliciting all types of different emotions and feelings out of me.

In hiking we tend to search for and enjoy the views, the peaks, and the big stuff the most. But I absolutely love when a simple trail full fills exactly what you are looking for in nature without providing a breath taking view or a monstrous mountain.

Anyways, I made my way to the end of the Jump Off and had low expectations because I figured that the clouds, fog, or smoke would be preventing a great view. Ironically, the smoke and clouds created the most beautiful and unique view I had ever scene. The trail came to a cliff that was straight down and clouds had literally rolled right up to the edge of this cliff and filled the entire valley floor for as far as I could see. In the distance were mountains that the sun was rising over. Purple, orange, and red were glowing past the mountain while clouds and smoke were literally pouring over the mountain, creating a waterfall of smoke. This all created the most spectacular, beautiful, intriguing, and unique sunrise or view I have come across yet.

I reluctantly took off and made my way back to the parking lot, where I had to walk/hitch hike my way back to my car 3 miles away. A nice man from Arkansas, with his young boy, and at least 5 bibles on the dashboard gave me a ride back to my car completing my first every solo adventure into the wilderness.

Going alone was interesting. It was definitely much more scary than I imagined it would be, but the solitude and the silence of the trail alone was worth the anxiety. You are literally just left to the sounds your boots make on the ground, the breath of your own lungs, running water and other natural sounds, and your own thoughts.

March Mandness

I find it hilarious that when March roles around everyone becomes an expert and a prophet. Some how people who have been barely been following basketball all year become experts about who will run the show, what the big upsets will be, and who the Cinderella team will be.

We know it wont happen how we or the experts predict it will happen, yet we don't hesitate in attempting to predict the future.

I looked into my smokey glass ball and guess what I saw. For the first time ever a number 1 seed loses to the 16 seeded team. Thats right, Vermont stuns Syracuse by shooting lights out against the 2-3 zone. Butler and Gonzaga face each other to get to the elite 8 for the showdown of the mid-majors. An epic game that etches itself into NCAA tourney lure when Gordan Hayward drains a last second shot to not only make it to the final 4 but to prove that Butler is the best mid-major thats not really a mid-major in the country.

I dont care what happens after that...It be nice if we kept winning, but I would be satisfied in making it that far.

Butler has made the tournament 12 of the last 14 years. Thats not easy my friends.

All I know is I cant wait for the tourney buzz to begin and for the upsets to appear out of no where. I am really am confident that this year all cylinders are clicking smoothly and at full gear for something special to happen. Could Butler be the next George Mason? Well in my very unbiased opinion, I think it is more than possible, and I am sure HOPING SO!

What Does God Require of us?

WIthin the past few weeks I have been struggling with life in general. I have been doubting, angry, fighting, hating others, and I've been using violent passive aggressive tactics with friends. I have been told I am not good enough in various direct and indirect ways. I am a terrible son and brother.

Many of nights recently I have lied in bed wandering if I am really following christ.

If I am following christ would not I be different than I was a month, a year, or a week ago? Would not God answer my prayers, subdue my doubts, and heal holes in me from past relationships?

The question that remains is what does God require of us?

What has comforted me through this interesting time is the truth that God does not require or demand change or growth. Those things, growth, change, and transformation are in God's hands and for as hard as I try to "be like I feel God wants me to be" I will fail.

God shows us that he works on his divine timetable, that we can not alter with our anxiousness or our worries. (Resurrection of Lazarus, Healing of Jairus' Daughter, Moses Exodus, etc.)

I also know that it is truth that to come to God we need not change, but only come humbly in our brokenness and sinfulness before God in the hope that we might know God more. I think that might be it: God wants us to be intimate with him and for him to get to know us and for us to get to God. To attempt, try, to claw at, to work at, to pursue relentlessly our creator in the hopes that we might KNOW God more.

Then and only then in our Humility, Brokenness, and Pusural of God will we find life as it was meant to be. And who knows maybe we will Change, Grow, and Transform and maybe we wont. Maybe tomorrow I will be healed permanently of past relationships maybe I will be on my death bad praying for God to heal me. Doesn't matter as long as I come under the shadow of God each day and each moment in Humility and Brokenness hoping to know the creator of the cosmos all the way down to the color of my eyes more.

Thoughts on God and Evil (Different forms of Evil)

Diff forms of evil and what is the point of them? And what does God do with them?

Although, evil has a simple definition: Evil is the simple disregard of human life, a disregard of justice, and the valuing of one life over the other. Just by looking around at the world and our lives we can notice that there are many forms of evil. These different forms of evil are important to point out to make clear what God thinks about these evils.

For the first form of evil we need to look no further than ourselves to find. As I stated before humans have a problem of sin that if not reconciled leads to the devaluing of life that leads to evil actions as simple being rude to your waiter or as complex and terrible as herding people on to a death train on its way to Auschwitz. Yet, in the same breath, it is very important not to use the word evil lightly. Much like sin is a deeper problem that leads to sins, evil as I have defined, is a deeper problem that leads to evils.
The solution to this evil is in relationship. Since, the problem of sin is a problem of disconnection and wrong relationship with God this must be reconciled to make it possible and easier to see the world with God’s eyes; to see the “createdness” of the individual and the equal playing field that humanity rests on.

Invisible People TV is an organization and website that interviews homeless people so that there lives will not be invisible but very visible through their stories recorded on video. Jay, a homeless man from Cleveland is asked what he would wish for if he was given three wishes. What he says is simply profound,
“If I had three wishes, I believe first that everyone would treat everyone as equals. The man who has a 100,000 dollar job is not better that the person who is picking up garbage on the corner for somebody. Were all the same, were all human beings why can’t we just help each other. And I think if everyone did that I might not even need two more wishes.”

No theologian or philosopher can say it better than that. Jay is down and out, has been out of work for two years and has been getting the run around by every social service agency he has come to. He knows what evil is, he knows what suffering is and amazingly in the midst of economic turmoil he does not wish for a million dollars but simply that people won’t devalue one person over the others. Jay recognizes what is at the root of the evils of this world.

Thoughts on God and Evil (god)

This is the section dedicated to understanding God's character inlight of the evil that I defined and described above. Answering questions like Why Would God Let Evil Persist? etc.

God

God’s very essence is to be in relation or in community with others. This is witnessed in God’s relationship with Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Out of God’s relational essence came his desire for creation. Heyward, describes real relation as one founded in love, humility, and God . This is the context that humans were created out of. Because right relation rests on the capacity to choose and not be forced into relationship, God is restricted by his loving desire for genuine relationship to give humans free choice. Yet, there is undoubtedly something in this world that corrupts the choices people make.

This is sin not evil. In my terms sin is separation and disconnection from God. Heyward would put this as not being in right relation with God. This disconnection (sin) blinds us from seeing each others as equals (evil) and hence there lies the justification for evil actions. The devaluation of a person is rooted in the problem of sin that leads to evil as the concept I have described which leads to evil actions. Yet, without free will God could not be in a right loving relation with humanity. This paradox of sorts can be summed up like this.

Free will and choices lead to evil.
Love is dependent on free will.

As well, love and right relation with God and others in the only way to remove evil from the perpetual paradoxical cycle.
From this we can establish how God feels about Evil. The prophet Amos tells us that God hates evil and Isaiah tells us that God loves justice . God would prefer there to be no evil, because he would prefer us to love others equally, or as Jesus says in Matthew 22 to love your neighbor as yourself. In this God reminds us of our humanity, that we are all on equal playing fields and valuing one life over another is evil. God does not desire a world full of genocide, murder, or any other action caused by the devaluing of life but a world of mutuality, equality, and solidarity.

God's View and Our View of the World

Greek influence on Christianity has lead to a place where it has been commonplace to separate the physical from the spirit. This has lead to theological interpretations that have created a God who places paramount importance on the soul and that does not care about the physical that is fading away. This has had extreme implications for the justification of evil throughout history and very much so today. It is not out of the ordinary to hear someone say, “Jesus is coming back soon, this is Earth is going to explode and be done away with, and so why not use it up.” This is an example of what may happen if this perspective that God does not care about the physical is taken on. There is a disregard for the value of the Earth and raping and pillaging it dry of its resources is not only justified it is what God wants us to do.

Thoughts on God and Evil

This semester I took a seminar class on theodicy. Theodicy is the theological/philosophical discussion of justifying a "good" or "loving" God with the reality of evil that plagues the world. Our final assignment was to come up with our own theodicy, or our own personal way that we justify a the existence and belief in a good God with evil.

Here are some high lights. (that will come in parts)

Evil
Often scholars will stray away from defining evil and point to massive historical events of suffering as examples to define evil. No doubt Hiroshima, the Holocaust, and other horrific events are accurate examples of evil, but it is dangerous to avoid defining evil. If in defining evil the hope is to better understand evil so it can be avoided in the future than a clear definition of evil must be presented. What about Stalin’s reign and the Trail of Tears should never be repeated? In defining evil we must find the underlying root that is common in everything that would be deemed evil. Evil is the simple disregard of human life, a disregard of justice, and the valuing of one life over the other. From this comes the justification necessary to allow the suffering of one or many to persist.
The Holocaust could never have been possible if the Jews lives were valued as much as Germans. In order for the final solution to go forward Jews had to become less than humans, vermin that plagued the earth from reaching its potential. It is simply impossible to put a family member or friend that you know to be deserving of life just as mush as you on a train leading to Auschwitz.

Irreplaceable

I love this and have been trying to think of myself as irreplaceable in God's eyes. More importantly, if we can find out why people around us are so irreplaceable to God by building deep relationships or trying to take on the perception that God sees the world, I will be able to love people a whole lot better.


"Egotism is pathological self-obsession, a reaction to anxiety about whether or not I really count. It is for our acute self-conciseness and can be prevented and healed only by the experience of being adequately loved. it is, indeed, a desperate response to frustration of the need we all have to count for something and be held to be irreplaceablee"
-Dallas Willard, Divine Conspiracy